Fifteenth Log Entry 10/4/04

Top Ten Lame Excuses for Not Surfing



10. My dog ate my surfboard. This is a classic, only noone believes it. Try again.

9. I went on vacation. Pretty weak, why didn't you go on vacation somewhere you could surf?

8. I damaged my surfboard. You idiot, you are surrounded by billions of gallons of water. How do you manage to run into anything that could actually damage your surfboard?

7. My leash broke. Poor baby, what do you think people did before the leash was invented?

6. Surf was too big. Eddie would go.

5. Surf was too small. If we could surf yesterday, it can be done. Yesterday, all we needed was a rubber duckie and it would have been a (cold) bathtub.

4. I stayed up too late. Poor decision making does not a surfer make.

3. I drank too much last night. See #4.

2. I didn't want to go. GASP!!!



And the number 1 lame excuse of all time for not going surfing...



1. I dropped a measuring tape on my knee.



Yes, it is true. An object (any object) dropped from a height of 6 ft and impacting another object at a height of 2 ft will have a speed of 16 ft/sec (11 mph) at the time of impact. This object weighing half a pound will have 64 ft-lbs of kinetic energy. If the flat side of this object hits muscle, this energy could be absorbed without the victim noticing. However, if the corner of the object hits the spot directly above the kneecap where there is not much muscle, the result is a painful sensation similar to getting whacked in the funny bone. If you are lucky, the pain dissipates quickly and you go on your way. If you are unlucky, you wake up around midnight with a knee twice the size it should be and throbbing painfully. Not being able to sleep you limp to the TV only to discover that the bonus disc of a ten disc documentary, that you thought was going to be bad, dissapoints even your meager expectations. Finally after the painpills kick in, you limp back to bed with that terrible feeling, knowing you won't be surfing tomorrow.